About MeI’ve worked for over “20 years as a psychotherapist, counsellor and coach with a private practice in Sydney’s Eastern Suburbs... Read more
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I understand that relationships and families come in diverse forms – heterosexual, gay, lesbian, step parents and single parents negotiating positive communication with their exes.
Couples with busy lifestyles often wonder why they don’t have the same spark as they had at the beginning of their relationship, or why their communication has deteriorated. Time and work demands can contribute to this and the couple as an ‘organism’ needs loving attention and tending to as you would anything to keep it alive. Many find that after having children their energy and loving attention for each other dwindles greatly. If this continues, over time it can create painful problems like disconnection, distancing and conflict. These are strong signs of a need for relationship attention and nurturance.
If you are stuck in patterns that cause hurt and frustration in your relationship, trust and intimacy can feel impossible. In couple sessions we address:
When couples are feeling the pain of distance and disconnection in their relationship there are usually underlying issues and beliefs. How does this get corrected in a way that starts healing a breakdown in communication and distancing. In relationship counselling I work with the couple dynamic – your communication style with each other, the ‘hotspots’ that create communication problems, areas of provocation and escalation, and ways of addressing the unhealthy patterns. Together we work on deepening understanding in the relationship. I offer couples practical and accessible tools to take home in order to re-establish connection.
“I have seen various counsellors over the years, and realised that, as with all relationships, it helps to find the ‘rightfit’. Shushann stood out as a therapist and made a lasting difference to how I view relationships. She was marvellous in the way she really listened, and gave me the tools to work on my role in a committed relationship with my now husband. Certain ideas she gave me still stay with me today. I have learned how to ‘read’ situations differently, and I no longer feel the need to run away from confrontations. I am now in a very loving and devoted relationship and we have a very gorgeous little girl. I shudder sometimes to think how my life could have gone in a very different direction… Sometimes, even the smallest ideas can make a big and powerful difference… Thank you Shushann!!!”
Communication problems start to arise when little or no energy is available for the relationship – whether it’s to do with children, stressful work or family commitments. Couples may start experiencing a breakdown in communication, increased irritation with each other, misunderstandings, conflict or distrust. These are strong signs to take a breather and reassess the situation. To pull back our energy and start re-building the goodwill in the relationship.
Integral to my work is:
When I work with people on nurturing their relationships, I ask them what they are consciously doing to nurture their love relationship. This doesn’t require a lot of time, but does require consistency. They might be small acts of kindness, intimacy and respect. It is the quality of the connections that people make with one another that contributes to filling the relationship with juice.
We often seek out love and acceptance from others when we find it hard to give this to ourselves. Or we can get stuck in a cycle of over giving and over accommodating, never allowing ourselves to stop and receive. In our individual counselling sessions we address: